How to use a drip coffee maker to make 9 foods PLUS beer!!

[grndslm]

This is probly an unusual post, but certainly deserves a thought....

Food You Can Make in a Coffee Maker | Geekosystem

[h=1]10 Foods You Can Allegedly Make In A Coffee Maker[/h]by Max Eddy | 10:57 am, February 3rd, 2011

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Like so many before me, I was once hungry in college. With term papers looming and the dining hall already closed for the night, food had to come from somewhere. That was the night I learned to make ramen in my coffee maker. At first I was nervous, pouring the hot water over noodles in my bowl, covering them, and letting it steep. Eventually, I became more adventurous: cooking the noodles in the carafe; putting the seasoning packet in the basket that normally holds the filter; adding an egg.
This was cheap food prepared in as cheap a manner as possible. But I had touched just the tip of the iceberg. It turns out there are plenty of foods you can whip up with a Mr. Coffee and some bravery. Our favorites are below. Keep in mind that when cooking with unconventional methods, you run the risk of producing sub-par food and maybe exposing yourself to the dangers of undercooked food. Attempt at your own risk, read with an open mind.
1. Oatmeal

Put two packets of instant oatmeal into the carafe. Add an individual packet of honey, an individual packet of fruit jam, and a pinch of salt. Put an herbal tea bag (e.g. orange flavored) into the filter basket. Pour 8-10 ounces of water into the coffee maker, turn on the machine, and the oatmeal will be ready in about 5 minutes.

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A dead simple recipe, but with the twist of adding a tea bag for flavor. Clearly, whoever wrote this coffee maker recipe is a stone-cold pro. He’s been there, he’s seen things, he’s lived to tell about it, and he needs some orange flavored oatmeal to do it.
2. Broccoli

Fill a coffee filter with six broccoli florets. Load into the coffee maker. Run six cups of water through for tender but still crisp veggies.

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Clever coffee maker cooks will find a way to whip up a cheese sauce to go with this. When you’re cooking in a coffee maker, health food is the least of your concern.
3. Rice

Put 1/2 cup of instant rice per person in the coffee maker. Run the appropriate amount of water (check the box for instructions) through the coffee maker, then leave the machine turned on for 5 to 10 minutes until the rice is fully cooked.

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Rice cookers are for squares.
4. Soft Boiled Eggs

Place the eggs in the coffee pot. Drip hot water over them. Let them cook for a few more minutes.

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Several commenters observed that if it is possible to poach eggs in a coffee maker, other foods could easily be poached. Fruit in warm wine or bologna were also recommended.
5. Lemon Pepper Chicken

Place chicken breast in coffee maker. Add enough water to cover about 1/4 of chicken. Sprinkle with lemon pepper seasoning. Turn on maker and cook about 15 min per side. Add milk and butter to remaining liquid, allow to heat for about a minute, and add potato flakes for a quick side of mashed potatoes.
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I know what you’re thinking: the thought of cooking meat in a something as low-powered as a coffee maker is completely unappealing. However, Gizmodo adapted this recipe for couscous and chicken and recorded the results. Of note is their choice of side dish, which would probably cook up better than mashed potato flakes, and their advice about steaming vegetables in the chamber that normally holds the coffee grounds. Also, they note that while the chicken does not brown, it does cook well enough.

6. Chicken Pesto Pasta
A bit of a riff on the classic “ramen in the coffee pot,” this clever recipe has you cook thin-cut chicken breasts on the heating element, cook the noodles in the carafe, then whip up a quick pesto in a coffee grinder.

A coffee grinder is a solid hack to make the fresh basil pesto sauce — olive oil, pine nuts, salt, pepper, garlic and the aforementioned fresh basil.
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Of note is that, once again, the chicken doesn’t appear to to brown. Cooked is cooked, though. Right?
7. Fish Steaks

As mentioned above, if you can poach an egg, you should be able to do a lot more. Here’s the rundown on how to tackle a fish steak. Some commenters noted that trout would work well for this recipe.

Steaks should be approximately 3/4 inches thick to ensure even cooking. Place steak in filter and run 10 cups of water through the coffeemaker. Flip steak, and run another 10 cups of water through machine.
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8. Chive and Butter Sauce
Not a meal on its own, but you’ll need something to go with that fish, rice, chicken, or veggies.

Dice one small shallot into the coffee maker. Load two to four sprigs of fresh thyme into the filter basket without a filter, then run 1 cup of cream and 1 teaspoon of lemon juice through the coffee maker together. Season with salt and pepper, and allow the sauce to reduce over the hot plate for 15 to 20 minutes. Just before serving, add 1 tablespoon diced butter and swirl to melt. (Note: Coffee maker will require heavy cleaning afterward.)

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Recipes 3, 4, and 8 come from a larger article on how to prepare a meal in your hotel room, which contains such pearls of wisdom as recommending you use a safety razor to sprinkle black truffle shavings over your finished meal. Genius.
9. Chocolate Fondue
The perfect dessert for your shifty, coffee-maker meal.

5 2.6 oz. dark chocolate candy bars, broken into small pieces
1 cup of whipping cream

2 bananas, sliced
1 apple, sliced
1 basket of strawberries, whole
Pour cream in glass decanter and heat for 15 minutes. Add broken candy bars to cream and heat for 10 minutes. Stir to create a smooth, rich sauce. Heat for an additional 5 minutes, then remove decanter from heat source. Spear fruit with forks and dip in chocolate sauce to coat. Serves three.
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10. Beer
This sounds insane, but bear with us. Southern Fried Science has produced the definitive article on “how to brew beer in a coffee maker, using only materials commonly found on a modestly sized oceanographic research vessel.” They recommend using cereals for grains, vegemite for malt, and seaweed for hops. Amazing.

1. 
   [*]Grind up your ‘grains’ (but not so much that it becomes powder).
   [*]Place your ‘grains’ in coffee pot (not the filter basket, the carafe).
   [*]Run 2 cups of clean water through coffee maker and let it sit on the hot plate for an hour. This releases all the good chemicals from you ‘grains’ and creates a fluid called wort.
   [*]Strain the wort through the coffee filter and place the filter full of ‘grain’ into the filter basket. Add the ‘malt’ to the filter basket. Pour the strained liquid back into coffee maker and add 1 cup of water.
   [*]Run the wort through the coffee maker 5 times, each time adding 1 cup of water.
   [*]Pour the wort into the saucepan and boil for 45 minutes. Two minutes before boiling is done, add the hops.
   [*]Carefully pour the wort into the canning jars.
   [*]Let the wort cool to between 60 and 70 F. Once it is cool enough to touch the outside of the jars without burning, pitched the Bakers’ Yeast into the mixture.
   [*]Seal jar with a handkerchief and rubber band over the mouth, and let sit for 3 to 5 days.
   [*]And table spoon of sugar to the jar and seal with the lids, making sure they’re air tight.
   [*]Store in a cool, dark place where it will not be disturbed for a week.​

So the next time you’re in a hotel and reaching for the phone and steeling your nerves to fork over $30 for a crappy pizza, go for the coffee maker instead. And if you’re willing to throw the clothes iron in to the mix, it opens up all sorts of possibilities. Now go out there, and cook some dinner in the most backward way imaginable.​

How to brew beer in a coffee maker, using only materials commonly found on a modestly sized oceanographic research vessel. « Southern Fried Science

[h=1]How to brew beer in a coffee maker, using only materials commonly found on a modestly sized oceanographic research vessel.[/h]
By Andrew David Thaler, on February 8th, 2010

The Flip - one research vessel that mandates a drink

Originally published on April 26, 2009 How to brew beer in a coffee maker, using only materials commonly found on a modestly sized oceanographic research vessel has been one of our most popular posts. Over the past year, through experimentation and advice from fellow scientists and brewers, I’ve modified the recipe. The biggest criticism was that in order to make good beer, you needed to smuggle hops aboard. “Well, if you can bring hops aboard” they ask, “what’s to stop you from bringing any other brew supplies aboard?” The answer is nothing. So we went back to the brew pot, experimented with new reagents, and bring you now the definitive guide to brewing beer in a coffee maker, using only materials commonly found on a modestly sized oceanographic research vessel.

Introduction​

Beer brewing is the delicate and dedicated blending of art and science. Finding the perfect balance of grains, hops, malt, adding just the right flavoring agents, boiling for exactly enough time to release the tannins, starches, humic acids from you wort, activating enzymes to break down those starches, forging the perfect mash from the ether of sobriety to give birth to that most glorious pint, these are skills that take a lifetime to master. Perfect beer is meticulously planned and carefully crafted.
Screw that.
You’re six days into a 2 month expedition, and if you were lucky enough to not be on a dry ship, it’s de facto dry by now anyway. You’re eying the ethanol stores, the crew is eying each other, and all hell will break loose if y’all don’t get some sweet water soon. This is no time for artistry.
This is not, as a rule, a terribly good beer (though, with a good brewmaster on board, it can be). This is a beer to pass the time and ease the pain of life at sea. I can guarantee that if you are careful, it will be at least as good as the cheapest commercial alternative.

Materials​

The tools you need are simple: an electric drip coffee maker with hot plate, a coffee filter, 2 1-liter glass sample jars with air-tight lids, 2 handkerchiefs, 2 rubber bands, and a source of clean (preferably R/O) water.
You’ll have to be more creative with your ingredients. Your need grains, malt, hops, and something for flavor. Simple grains such as those found in common cereals – Raisin Bran, Cracked Wheat, Kashi, whatever you can find – are decent sources of starches and usually contain enough enzymes to break the most complex proteins down. Fruit and nuts will add flavor, but are not important. The grains should be ground as fine as possible, rolled under a rolling pin or crushed in a mortar and pestle. The smaller the grains the greater the reactive surface area.

ugh...

Malt is tricky. It is possible to create an all grain beer, but with the inferior products you’re brewing with, you want to give the yeast more to eat. In my experience, the best you can hope for is vegemite, marmite, or some other yeast extract. These products are extracted from brewer’s yeast to begin with, so they already contain ideal food for yeast to thrive on. The problem is that they also tend to be very salty. Fortunately, you’re in luck, because the process involved in brewing this at-sea hooch will leave the salt happily stuck to the inside of your coffee maker and not in your mash.
Originally, I promoted smuggling hops on board, since they would be the hardest to find. Over the last year I have received advice from brewers and scientists alike assuring me that there are most certainly alternatives to hops that you can find on board a modestly sized oceanographic research vessel. Everything from orange peels to sage leaf are effective, keeping in mind they they may add a very different flavor to your beer. One home-brewer even recommended a completely different weed altogether. However, in keeping with the maritime theme of this recipe, seaweed should be your bittering agent of choice. Both bladderwort and sargassum have been used effectively to make very tasty beer.
Finally, you’ll need to find some yeast. Most ships will have bakers’ yeast. If you’re very lucky they might have brewers’ yeast.

Methods​

Sanitation is key. If you have an autoclave, sterilize your tools ahead of time. Otherwise, wash everything with an iodine solution or, if there are no other options, ethanol. Contamination is your enemy. Everything must be clean. Boil the handkerchiefs, rubber bands, sample jars, and lids.

1. Grind up your ‘grains’ (but not so much that it becomes powder).
2. Place your ‘grains’ in coffee pot (not the filter basket, the carafe).
3. Run 2 cups of clean water through coffee maker and let it sit on the hot plate for an hour. This releases all the good chemicals from you ‘grains’ and creates a fluid called wort.
4. Strain the wort through the coffee filter and place the filter full of ‘grain’ into the filter basket. Add the ‘malt’ to the filter basket. Pour the strained liquid back into coffee maker and add 1 cup of water.
5. Run the wort through the coffee maker 5 times, each time adding 1 cup of water.
6. Pour the wort into the saucepan and boil for 45 minutes. Two minutes before boiling is done, add the hops.
7. Carefully pour the wort into the canning jars.
8. Let the wort cool to between 60 and 70 F. Once it is cool enough to touch the outside of the jars without burning, pitched the Bakers’ Yeast into the mixture.
9. Seal jar with a handkerchief and rubber band over the mouth, and let sit for 3 to 5 days.
10. And table spoon of sugar to the jar and seal with the lids, making sure they’re air tight.
11. Store in a cool, dark place where it will not be disturbed for a week.

Results​

Southern Fried Brewmaster

A cool, smooth brew, flavored with whatever you found. It may be very bad, it may be good. It will be beer.

Conclusion​

You are now the most popular person on the boat. Enjoy.
Please note – these methods can be adapted to any lab or field work that demands it. The modestly sized oceanographic research vessel is not mandatory.
I’d like to thank everyone who has tested and experimented with this method. Please report back with your successes and failures.
~Southern Fried Scientist

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