Well there is no 'temp solenoid'... it likely has a 3-way solenoid as it shares parts with the Silvia as well as having 2 thermostats, one for brew temp and one for steam temp.
You say the unit gets extremely hot... what part of the machine are you referring to? If it gets too hot there should be a safety cutout that will pop (likely resettable), killing power to the element to protect it. Silvias will flash boil after the element kicks OFF until a lower brew temp is obtained (by flushing or simply waiting) at the group, this could be what you're seeing.
You can get an idea of pump flow by measuring how much water you get from the group. Should be 3-4 oz. in 10 seconds.
As mentioned, you must use very fresh coffee to obtain crema. The number 1 cause of thin/watery coffee is stale coffee.
The Rocky is a great grinder, but every coffee is different and requires dialing in regardless of what has worked for others.
Just because somebody is a 'master roaster' doesn't mean they know equipment that well.
