Here's my reality.
I worked in finance for about four years, was too boring for me, left and delivered pizza for nearly 10 years before my wife (whom I married 7 years into my delivery gig) and I opened our shop. She was finishing college and about to go to graduate school for education.
So in 2001, just a few short months after getting married, we attended classes through the Small Business Development Center at our local Community College, and formed our corporation. Over the next three years, we started by frequenting local shops and taking notes. We both worked, and made sound investments. We traveled to the best shops in the pacific northwest, while attending the CoffeeFest trade show in Seattle for a couple of years in a row and taking as many classes as possible. In addition we looked at coffee shops overseas for design ideas, and contacted a lease consultant and started looking for spaces.
During the 18 months and 3 sets of negotiations on different properties until we found the right location, space, and lease for our business, we spent $1500 on a Mazzer Mini and a small, prosumer espresso machine and tested dozens of different and espressos from various roasters throughout the country. When we got to our top ten, we did all blind testing, took notes, scored, tested again, and picked our roaster and espresso. We scoured Ebay, and local restaurant supply shops for wares and equipment. We saved thousands of dollars by finding cases of great ceramics. We bought our ice maker, espresso machine, and refrigeration equipment new, as we didn't want to guess on how good it was. My wife negotiated deals with overseas companies for all our our tea supplies as well as printing for our cups. It was a busy time.
We traveled and met with our roaster, our machine manufacturer, and continued to hone our skills. We signed our lease at the beginning of 2004, hired a contractor to do our build out, both left our current jobs a few months after that, and (roughly) some $100K (from savings and an equity line of credit on our house), we opened that summer. It's been over ten years now, and we are proud of our accomplishments.
A word to the wise, unless you have an awesome and extremely supportive wife like I do, don't open a small business. Both of you have to be all in or it will be a dangerous undertaking.